Can I Keep The House

A QUESTION I OFTEN GET from people going through divorce is, “Can I keep the house?”  This seemingly simple question is actually a multifaceted one fraught with complicated facts and emotions.  Years ago a man literally divided the house in half  by using a chainsaw to cut through the roof and the walls.  That triumph of emotion over intellect is not the preferred way of answering the question. Generally, there are two main areas with many sub-parts to explore.  First, does the income and asset picture allow you to buy your [...]

By | 2017-02-27T22:30:48+00:00 January 27th, 2016|Divorce|Comments Off on Can I Keep The House


When you’re going through a divorce, discovery is a word you see and hear a lot.  What is discovery? Generically, discovery is the term for gathering the information you need to intelligently settle your case or failing that, presenting your case to the family court judge at trial.  Discovery takes many forms and the form and extent of discovery should be tailored to the facts and claims unique to each case.  Discovery can be expensive, so it’s doubly important to make sure that you engage in only the discovery [...]

By | 2017-02-27T22:05:26+00:00 September 27th, 2015|Discovery, Divorce|Comments Off on Discovery

More Expectations

Many years ago I represented a very nice woman. She made a nice appearance, spoke well and was polite. As mightily as we tried, we just couldn’t settle her case and wound up going to trial. I prepared her for her testimony, counselled her about how to act, and told her what to expect when we got to court. We agreed that she would wear a skirt and blouse or a dress.We were ready, I thought. She arrived at court wearing a very nice knee length dress and a cardigan [...]

By | 2017-02-27T22:13:46+00:00 August 27th, 2015|Divorce|Comments Off on More Expectations


For most people going through a divorce, it is their first experience with the legal system and with a lawyer. So, what can you expect? Indeed, what should you expect?CANDORYou should expect to be candid with your lawyer. Your lawyer can only help you and protect your legal rights if you tell him everything. Holding back puts him at a disadvantage, which puts you at a disadvantage. The last place your lawyer wants to learn something about you is from your spouse’s lawyer.Conversely, you should expect candor from your lawyer. [...]

By | 2017-02-27T22:40:31+00:00 July 27th, 2015|Divorce, Professionalism|Comments Off on Expectations

A Kinder Gentler Way to Divorce

The words "I want a divorce" are among the most devastating ever uttered. Hearing them can make you feel as though your world has spun off its axis. They can destroy your self esteem. You may feel as though you have failed in the most important relationship in your life. You worry about whether you will be kept from your children, whether you will be able to continue your lifestyle and even whether you will have the money to pay your bills. People treat you differently. The friends with [...]

By | 2017-03-06T21:10:51+00:00 March 4th, 2015|Divorce|Comments Off on A Kinder Gentler Way to Divorce

Sharing College Costs After a Divorce

One of the most difficult issues facing divorced parents is financing the college education of a child.  Since income which use to be available for one household must now support two, there is usually little opportunity to accumulate savings.  Psychological issues often intervene between parents and their maturing children and unresolved anger from the divorce resurfaces.  While it is nearly impossible to guarantee that both parents will contribute according to their financial ability, there are some strategies which will increase the likelihood that the child will receive financial help from [...]

By | 2017-03-06T21:09:56+00:00 March 4th, 2015|College Costs, Divorce|Comments Off on Sharing College Costs After a Divorce

Getting From The Starting Line To The Finish Line

The question I am often asked is: “How long will my divorce take?” The short answer is: “It depends.” However, that seemingly simple question really requires a fairly complicated answer. Divorce cases can only end two ways: an agreement of the parties (as the overwhelming majority of them do) or a decision by a judge after a trial. Agreements result from a series of compromises as the spouses give and take in an effort to reach common ground. Trials take place when one or both spouses conclude that compromise [...]

By | 2017-03-01T17:17:47+00:00 January 27th, 2015|Divorce|Comments Off on Getting From The Starting Line To The Finish Line

More FAQ’s

Q:    I don’t want a divorce.  Can I stop it or, at least, delay it until my spouse comes to his senses? A:    This is a question often asked by a spouse who is blind-sided by the news that his spouse wants a divorce.  Contesting the divorce itself is rare because the legal standards for proving the grounds and obtaining a divorce are not very stringent.  A spouse who wants a divorce will, virtually always, get one.  Contesting the divorce only delays the inevitable.  Although delay is possible, it almost [...]

By | 2017-03-01T17:24:53+00:00 December 1st, 2014|Divorce|Comments Off on More FAQ’s


Q:  What are the grounds for divorce in New Jersey? A: There are several traditional fault grounds, but the most common ground is irreconcilable differences, which is considered a no-fault ground. Q:  Does fault matter? A: Except in the most egregious cases, like the attempted murder of a spouse, the Supreme Court has ruled that fault is irrelevant to economic issues. Q: How long will it take to get a divorce? A: Although it varies, depending on the facts and complexity of each case, most divorces take ten to [...]

By | 2017-03-01T17:33:37+00:00 July 1st, 2014|Divorce|Comments Off on FAQ’s

Changed Circumstances – Part II

Last month I promised we would look at examples of changed circumstances – some that justify modification of an order or agreement and some that do not.  So, here they are. One would expect that a downturn in one’s economic circumstances would always justify a reduction in or termination of a support obligation.  Not always.  Cases are fact sensitive and the specifics of each case and the totality of the circumstances must be analyzed.That is why the loss of a job does not, in and of itself, justify a modification.  [...]

By | 2017-03-01T17:51:22+00:00 May 1st, 2014|Divorce|Comments Off on Changed Circumstances – Part II